Oh, honey, let me tell you about this thing, this picture thing. It’s about, you know, that game, the one with the big sword. Final Fantasy, they call it. Final Fantasy 7 Rebirth. This one’s about taking a picture, a real sad one, a suffering themed picture, they say. For this book writer fella, he can not write, they say he has the writer’s block, needs some help, some oomph to get his brain going.
So, you gotta find these ideas, like, things that make you go, “Oh, that’s just awful!” You know, like when you stub your toe real bad, or when that old dog next door runs off. Stuff like that. Make a picture. Sad one. They call it “suffering themed.”
Find the Sadness
Now, first thing, you gotta go somewhere. Someplace with water. I heard them youngsters talking, they said, “Head over to the Rugged Shoals.” Don’t ask me where that is, I ain’t got one of them fancy maps. But you’ll find it. I think it is near the sea. You will see a lot of broken rocks.
You gotta look around. Look for things that are just plain sad. Maybe a broken toy. Or a wilting flower. Or a lonely, rusty old thing. Anything that makes you feel a little bit down in the dumps. That’s the kind of stuff this fella, the writer, wants. He wants to feel that sadness, so he can write his book, I reckon.
Take a Picture
When you see something sad, you gotta take a picture. I think you use that little thing they call a camera or use some magic in the game. I don’t know how these newfangled things work. But you take a picture of it. Make sure it’s a good one, now. A real tearjerker. A real “suffering themed picture.” It is for this Final Fantasy 7 Rebirth game.
You know, like when you lose your favorite hen. Or when the rain washes away your garden. Or when you run out of sugar and can’t make your sweet tea. Those are sad things. Real sad. That’s the kind of stuff you gotta find and take a picture of, for this Final Fantasy 7 Rebirth picture thing.
More Sad Things in Final Fantasy 7 Rebirth
- A broken swing set.
- An empty bird’s nest.
- A lost puppy dog.
- A cracked mirror.
- A faded photograph.
That’s the kind of stuff that makes you feel sad. And that is what this writer fella needs. He needs to feel that sadness to get his ideas flowing. It is about this suffering themed picture. I don’t know why, but that’s what they say.
That Jules Fella
Now, I heard them talking about some fella named Jules. Big strong fella, they say. You don’t get a trophy for beating him this time. But you get something else. Some “Ab-Fab” thing. Don’t ask me what that is. Sounds silly to me. But they say it’s one of them collectibles. You can put it in that Johnny’s place, by the sea. They got a lot of stuff there, I hear. Eighty-eight things, they say you can collect. This “Ab-Fab” is one of them.
You also get a belt. A Champion Belt. They say it’s real good. One of the best things in this whole Final Fantasy 7 Rebirth game. Makes you stronger, I guess. Or maybe it just looks fancy. I don’t know. But that’s what you get for dealing with this Jules fella.
Crunch-Off and Sit-Ups
Oh, and there’s this other thing. A “crunch-off,” they call it. Sounds painful to me. You gotta do these things called sit-ups. You know, where you lay down and sit up, over and over again? My old bones ache just thinking about it.
This lady, Amina, she makes you do it. She says it’s a tutorial. Like a lesson, I guess. You gotta press these buttons, they say. R1, L1, L2, R2. All in a circle. Round and round. Just like churning butter, but with your fingers instead of your whole arm. For this Final Fantasy 7 Rebirth suffering themed picture.
I don’t know why you gotta do all this for a picture. Seems like a lot of work to me. But these young folks, they like their games and their gadgets. And this Final Fantasy 7 Rebirth, it’s a big deal, they say. So you do what you gotta do, I reckon. You find those sad things, take those suffering themed pictures, beat that Jules fella, and do those sit-ups. And maybe, just maybe, that writer fella will finally write his book.
Whew, I’m tired just talking about it. Think I need a nap. But you go on and do that picture thing. And tell me all about it when you’re done. I’m sure it will be a real hoot.
This is what they want, a suffering themed picture, right? Well, you go on and find those sad things. And take your pictures. I will be here, resting my old bones and hoping that the writer fella get his job done.
